Went to the new Dr. today and he gave me an ultrasound from a different angle. Seemingly, this dr. loves to give ultrasounds and is quite an expert at it, SO...
He did find some kind of growth near the baby's head. He said he wasn't sure what it was and we may not even see it when it aborts, but that there was definitely something wrong... and no, there was no heartbeat.
In an odd way (that I am not sure I makes me feel too good about myself), I felt better. It just seems so much harder to accept that a pregnancy is finished without a reason... And I thought that "it's better off this way", as it could have been some horrible deformity, or worse.
I still miss the Dream Baby, and suddenly every pregnant woman in the Los Angeles area seems to be going to all the places I go to, which reallllly sucks. Furthermore, I saw a teeny new born and that sucked too...
I'm sure I'll get over it. I just have an aching longing to hold a newborn.
I should probably volunteer to be a foster mom to newborns or something, maybe that will change my mind...
Who knows? Party on...
Gabriela
ONLY 1 MORE SHOPPING DAY UNTIL MY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!
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2 comments:
I feel so bad, but your right, at least you know now what happened.
One more day !! You will love being 40 trust me.
Happy one more day untill your Birthday !
Ellen
I am so sorry for your loss. I have had two miscarriages myself. It is not a fun thing to go through. I have two children now. My son is 23 and my daughter is 13. They are the lights of my life, along with their Dad.
Blessings!~
Susan
http://journals.aol.com/rjet33/CountryLivingSouthernStyle/
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