Sunday, October 31, 2004
Monday, October 25, 2004
I LOVE LIVING HERE!!
I'm so happy to be back in L.A. The weather has been amazing (outside of 3 days of rain) and everyday I get up and love looking around me... We're on the hill and the view is wonderful, as are the streets around us -- surrounded by all these beautiful trees, plants, flowers, etc. And *very* few bugs... if any at all.
This afternoon we went to a birthday party at a bowling alley and it was such a cool mixture of people and cultures, and everyone was as friendly to us as the hostess (who's a friend of mine from last year, when I went to the hospital with the ear infection).
Anyway, I have so much to write about I don't even know where to begin. It's so much it feels like nothing at all, like a huge mountain you don't notice because you're standing too close to it... I suppose the big question still lies with my last writing... Is the baby his or not?
I am very aware that many people think I should leave it alone if she's not doing anything, or bothering us with it, unfortunately I cannot disagree more. I think I owe it to my children to find out so someday they are not surprised by an unknown woman carrying their sibling. What's more, I really despise allowing her to have this sort of control over us as long as we don't know for sure. A sort of dark cloud lingering in the background. And for those of you who know me well, you know I can't leave a stone unturned...
tune in next time...
Thursday, October 21, 2004
Yes I'm back, back again...
I should write about my drive out here, the arrival into our new home and all that stuff, but there is something weighing heavier on my brain now...
Remember that entry where I wrote that "she" had given birth to her baby on the 2nd of September? Ok, now I don't know. It was either the 2nd or the 11th or the 12th, or maybe it was 2 months prior and that would mean it's my husband's...
As much as it would really seem an improbability, and as much as everyone who advises me has said "surely not", the fact remains that she lied about many things and most importantly she no longer wants to meet me face to face -- or at least not "tommorrow" as she put it, "but maybe in the future".
ARE YOU KIDDING ME??? I'm not about to re-live all this again in a couple of years... so I've opted out of this friendship of odd sorts...
Any thoughts/questions on this?